31st July - Perhentian Island to Taman Negara

We were up and packed early to the boat back to KualaPersuit. The speedboat to the island was a rollercoaster journey with everyone hanging on for dear life but the return journey was a lot steadier.

We were approached with a price to Taman Negara but when we refused because it was more expensive than on the island, a man came chasing after us and offered us a lot better price. He took us to  'Watercolours' where we sorted our tickets and had an hour spare for breakfast.

We were pointed towards the only place that looked open but had comically terrible service. The lady there often totally ignored people or wandered off halfway through speaking to them. We eventually managed to get a couple of slices of toast with 'kaya' (local jam) and went to the shops to stock up on snacks instead.

Our minibus left at 10am and we were only expecting a 3 hour journey to our final destination. About 3 hours later we made a lunch stop at a hotel buffet place where we ate a pure-carb lunch of rice, noodles and chips (with a few pieces of chicken)  and then changed buses.

I think our bus must have had a carbohydrate-heavy lunch as well because it crawled up the hills on the way to Taman Negara and made pretty slow progress through all the palm plantations that now replaced the rainforest.

After a detour to 'Hans Travel' in Jerantut, we arrived in Kuala Tahan - the access village to the rainforest - at about 6.30pm.

By this time we were thankful that we had booked our first night's stay through Hans and made our way to Tahan Guesthouse - a brightly painted place with inspirational signs posted around the place. Our room was equally bright and was painted with pictures of trees and fruit. It also had a little balcony that looked out onto some green space behind and the neighbouring mosque.

We dumped our stuff and went in search of food. Most of the restaurants seemed to be floating on the river rather than in the village itself and we stopped for a surprisingly nice dinner at a place called 'Nusa'. There wasn't very much at all in the village itself though so we were soon back in our room, listening to the loud call from the mosque, signalling that the Ramadan fast should now have been broken.

30th July - Perhentian Islands

We should have left this morning but we really didn't fancy booking a ticket for an early boat and bus journey last night - especially when we were still 'bobbing' from being on boats so much recently.

Instead, we decided to spend the day doing island things - so basically going to the beach, swimming in the sea and doing very little.

After a frustrating morning of computer nonsense, we finally made it to Long Beach - and promptly fell asleep. Normally, I apply sunscreen before I go out and again when we're outside but I was fast-on before I even though about my second-coat. At least 3 hours later, I woke up very thankful that I was still in the shade. I quickly stuck on some sunscreen and spent a little time reading and swimming.

On the walk back to our room, I started noticing that a few places felt a little more tender than usual. After a shower, I assessed the damage. A few little areas were annoyingly red and sore but most embrrassingly, I realised my filtrum, eyelids and chin were all burnt - giving me the look of someone with a severe cold.

29th July - Perhentian Island

Today we had a wonderful day snorkelling around the island. The trip was run by Matt at Maya's guesthouse so I'll try not to mention him too much to avoid confusion! He didnpt come out nto the water with us because it was Ramadan but he was a nice guy with a good sense of humour.

First stop wasTurtle Point where we immediately saw a turtle. I felt a bit sorry for the poor thing because boat-loads of tourists all turned up at the same time and started following him around. He didn't appear to be too fussed but I guess it's hard to tell with a turtle!

Shortly after, one of the boat men pointed out another one and, for a while, it had a small entourage of about 6 people but it wasn't very long before that one too was pretty much mobbed. Matt eventually got tired of being kicked in the face by over-enthusiastic turtle-watchers and went back to the boat but I could barely drag myself away.

My favourite parts were when the turtles surfaced to breathe before suberging again. It was then we got to see its other more conventional fishy companions which were constantly attached to its underside. Less pleasant was having stern words with the morons who kept diving dive to touch it - or even worse, reaching for it when it was trying to breathe.

We had a waterproof camera from Maya Matt and Peter managed to get a few good snaps so hopefully our Matt will manage to post some of them up with the blog.

Next stop was Shark Point. Only Johan saw a shark here but we did get to see lots and lots of pretty corals and fishes, including some pretty hefty ones. Apparently, the shark swam straight past me but I was too busy watching something else.

Next on the itinerary was Turtle Beach. So-called because that's where the turtles go to lay their eggs. However, Maya Matt assured us we would be able to see sharks there. We were all swimming around, keeping our eyes peeled because it was quite a cloudy day so there wasn't much light, when Matt and Janet called us over to where they were because, as Janet said, there were the biggest fish she had ever seen.

She was not wrong! There were 7 or 8 MASSIVE Bumphead Parrot Fish and they were amazing! They were over a metre long with a kind of 'beak' and teeth that you wouldn't want to get close too. They are herbivores and not considered dangerous but it's hard not to feel intimidated by something bigger than you, especially when it has the tools to break and eat tough corals. They can also change their sex which is pretty cool too! Unfortunately, we hadn't taken the camera off the boat with us that time but I think Maya Matt may have given us some pictures that he's taken previously.

Soon after that, we started to see black-fin reef sharks. They were hard to spot because they're the same colour as the water and they are pretty shy but I saw 3 and Matt said he saw 6! They were less scary than the Parrot Fish because they swam away from you pretty speedily, especially if they thought you were following them. It was still an amazing experience though.

After all the excitement of the morning, we stopped at the fishing village for some lunch. It was nice food but I felt sorry for Maya Matt because, even though he joined us, he wasn't able to eat or drink anything. It was still good humoured though and we were glad he was there.

After lunch we went to the Lighthouse where we dived the other day. We saw lots of big schools of fish  and enjoyed looking at the colourful corals again but, again, it was quite busy with people snorkelling and jumping off the lighthouse. We could see see the divers below the surface and the place where man-Holly had scratched 'Anji, Matt and Toby were here' into the concrete block that secured the buoy.

Last stop was Romantic Beach. Maya Matt (I haven't succeeded in not mentioning him much have I?) was clearly flagging with lack of food and water by then but he was still happy for us to take our time exploring the reef and looking for the blue-spotted stingray that were resting there. Matt and I managed to find one but there was no chance of getting a picture of it.

We swam across the beach to look around the rocks at the other side and it was sad to see so much broken, dead coral in the middle. This is hardly a surprise when we've seen the number of idiots who stand on the them but it also made us appreciate our impact as tourists too. There wasn't much on the other side so we returned to the first side and explored there until Maya Matt called us back.

After such a full day we were all shattered and keen to get copies of the pictures so we could go and get showered. I haven't had chance to look at them all yet but I'm sure they'll appear on the blog or Facebook at some point.

We had a very lovely evening at Shari' La restaurant, over-looking the sea, eating lots of food at their all-you-can-eat buffet. Matt was particularly impressed by the curious inclusion of old-fashioned British desserts of bread and butter pudding and blancmange.

28th July - Perhentian Island

We had another awesome day diving today. In the morning we went to the 'Temple' dive site. You can see the pinnacle above the water and it widens as you go deeper. We had a great time exploring the reefs and fishes with Rick and I could list all the stuff we saw but it'll probably be boring and I don't recognise most of them so I wouldn't expect anyone to be able to. With the exception of clownfish of course! There's must be very few people who wouldn't be able to identify Nemo.  Actually, dive-Holly says that Finding Nemo is pretty accurate so there's an excuse to finally get round to watching it.

At midday we had a quick lunch of super-spicy fried rice. It wasn't supposed to be but when we asked for it to be just a little spicy, I wonder if they misunderstood and thought we asked for really tiny chillies because I only picked half out and there were still at least 8 chillies on the side of my plate!

We also said our goodbyes to girl Holly who had made a spur-of-the moment decision to go to Siem Reap again.

The afternoon dive we went to the lighthouse. It was absolutely stunning and hard to beieve that so many amazing things were living so close to the surface. We had to be a little careful and keep close to the coral because people jump from the lighthouse and we didn't want them to land on our heads. Matt ran out of air earlier than us but we got to drop him off at the surface, see him to the boat and then continue diving for a little longer. We've mainly dived for around 40 minutes before but it was really great to be able to stay down for a whole hour. It still didn't feel like any time at all though!

When we got back, we filled in our log-books, chatted to everyone for a while and then went with Johan to look into snorkelling tomorrow. We've loved diving but even though it's cheap here, it still starts to stack up, and it's meant to be easier to see sharks and turtles on the snorkelling trips so we're looking forward to that!
Our evening was spent sitting on the beach eating a tasty (fish!) BBQ and chatting to Johan. Walking back along the beach to the sound of violins from Shari-La hotel was rather a pleasant change from the usual island soundtrack of thumping music.

27th July - Perhentian Islands

We got up at a reasonable time for the first time in days and got ready to go diving at D'Lagoon. Even before we started there was such a different approach with Ombak than DJL - much calmer, better organised, clearly explained. There were only 4 of us going and we just had a little boat so it was easier for them but we also preferred it.

The two guys doing the Open Water Course, Johan and Toby, went diving with Holly and we went with Rick, the owner. We both had a much easier descent and it made a big difference not to feel like we were holding people up. Our ears equalised much more easily and we were still going down when we saw a Hawkshead turtle in the distance. I was so excited and can't wait to go snorkling and maybe see some more, closer up.

The dive itself was amazing and, because it was a little boat, we only had to do a backward roll into the water rather than the horrible 'giant stride'. We also got to grips with bouyancy and swimming horizontally a little better. We took our time swimming around and felt like we were taking a lot more in and paying more attention to the fish and the corals. We even saw a huge Grouper in the distance. Rick was great and pointed out several things to us and even let us touch a sea-cucumber and play with some cleaner shrimp. We were doing pretty well with our air and had been down about 40 minutes when poor Matt got stung by a jellyfish and guzzled up most of what he had left.

Back on the boat Matt was treated with vinegar and was much braver and less moany than I would have been. We were soon joined by Holly, Toby and Johan and headed back to the dive centre for a debrief. Unlike our Open Water Course, Holly took some time to discuss the fish we had seen and show us some pictures so we could record it in our dive log.

26th July - Perhentian Island

We slept in in our lovely clean bed and then joined girl-Holly for a nic breakfast at Ewan's.

We took a wander across the island to Long Beach which is actually what it says on the tin - a beautiful, long, white, sandy beach with stunning blue, calm water. We skirted the crowds and found a nice shady spot for a laze and a read for several hours. We swam in the sea and enjoyed the fine, sandy sea bed in comparison the the rockiness of Coral Beach but, because of the loack of rocks and coral, there weren't any fish or sea-life to look at.

After dinner, we booked our dive with Ombak and enjoyed a bit more of a chat with charasmatic dive-holly. We tried our equipment on and were impressed by the newness and quality of it, as well as the fact that it wasn't just thrust on us on the morning of the dive.

I spent the rest of the evening trying to write blog but, after I'd got sucked into Facebook, the battery was low and I couldn't face sitting in the hot room so it could charge. Instead, I enjoyed more time reading and chilling on our little balcony outside our room.

25th July - Penang to Perhentien Island

We were up at 4am to get ready for the 5am minibus. We commandeered a seat on the front row in the hope it would be a more comfortabe ride but I had a rocking, clicking seat that kept reclining itself onto the legs of the poor guy behind. Combined with the windy road and sharp braking, we didn't get much sleep but the bus driver very nice and friendly and made regular short stops so the 5 1/2 hour journey still flew by.
We arrived at Kuala Besut about 10.30, signed in at the surprisingly helpful desk and took our first speed boat. It cut through the water at a thrilling speed, bouncing up and doown dramatically and  spraying us all with water. It was really good fun and the kids on the boat didn't stop grinning. The water was an amazing colour and the islands looked a lot better preserved than the Thai islands we'd seen.

We dropped a few others off at their respective beaches and arrived at our destination, Coral Bay. We were last off the boat because I couldn't stop looking at the school of fish that were next to boat and resting in the shade of the pier. We hardly walked a few paces down the pier when we saw a shark gliding through the shallows. We also spotted a long, thin swordfish type thing and big, pretty, colourful ones.

I left Matt in the shade and enquired along the beach about accomodation but most places full or too expensive. It came to a toss up between Ewan's and Aur-Bay. Ewan's was not available until after 3, was only free for one night and even though it had nice chalets, they looked onto a patch of land that was being landscaped.  Aur-bay was not so nice but it was on the beach, available immediately and cheaper. We went for tight option to save a couple of quid a night.

After a quick shower, when I realised there was no sink and the floor had a constant pool of water (which meant I had to take my trousers off to take a wee!) we asked around a few of the schools about diving. We stopped at Ombak diving school first. We were expecting a price and the name of a site or two but were given a very detailed and passionate explanation of the options by a guy called Holly. We both took to him immediately and foud ourselves wishing he'd taught us to dive. We also asked at Quiver and, though they were nice, we preferred the personal approach of Holly. Unfortunately, Matt's ears were still feeling bad with the 'Baro Trauma' he sustained at Koh Tao after not equalising properly and so decided to give it a day or so before taking the dive.

Back at the room, Matt fell to sleep but the bed smelled funny so I couldn't drop off. Instead I wandered the few metre to the beach. There was no shade at all by this time so I went in the sea. The tide was out and it was really rocky underfoot and so didn't swim. I could have braved the rocks and walked in further but to be honest, even though I knew the sharks weren't dangerous, I didn't fancy running into one alone and so gave up and sat on the balcony outside our room.

Under the opposite bungalows, there was a large 'swamp' where all of the shower water ran out into the ground. I thought I's seen something swimming in it earlier but,as I sat there, 2 HUGE lizards over a metre long came out and faced each other off for a bit. They scrurried back in the water before Matt got a look at them but they were like mini dinosaurs.

We went to a beach front restaurant for food and to watch the sun set. We bumped into a girl called Holly who I'd briefly met earlier and so asked her to join us so we could pass the time while the family at the restaurant broke their Ramadan fast and started taking orders again. We had a nice chat about her job which was interesting because she works at a mine in Mongolia teaching safety and had a few funny stories about how strange it could be, especially at the fortnightly disco.

We went back to go to bed but the bed smelled so fusty that I took a closer look. The pillow cases were mouldy and the bed covers didn't look much healthier so I asked at reception for some different ones. When I took covers off I was horrified to find that the pillows themselves were black with a respiritary disease level of mould. I quickly ran up to Ewan's to ask if the room was still free and felt lucky to discover that someone had cancelled. Back at Aur-bay, I spoke to the cocky guy there and found out that he was well aware of the problem. He would not give us all our money back and was quite rude and dismissive. We packed our stuff, asked whether they fancied returning the rest of the money in exchange for the lock and, since they didn't, we out the padlock on the foor and took the key as a souvineer.

Ewan's Place was even more lovely than I remembered now that it wasn't full of workmen and I kicked myself for not checking in there in the first place. Ewan himself was as sweet and generous as when I met him earlier and offered to make us some food even though the kitchen was closed. After all the excitement, it was about 1.30am before I feel asleep.

24th July - Penang

We planned to spend the day at Penang National Park so went to find somewhere for a filling and healthy breakfast. Somehow, I ended up with a fried roti banana which was bizarrely served with a spicy masala sauce. It started chucking it down before we'd even finished so we waited for the rain to slow a little before heading out to catch the bus.
The aircon on the bus was set to 'arctic' again and so I was grateful for the extra layers of waterproof jacket and a cardy, even thought it was still pretty cold.

We checked in at the National park entrance (so that they could come and get us if we didn't return) and decided on the walk to Turtle Beach rather than Monkey Beach. There were lots of steps climbing up and down and we were very sweaty but the walk was only an hour or so and we barely came across anyone else - just a group of 3 guys who appeared to be running and so were obviously insane. We did see a huge centipede and a few butterflies though.

Turtle beach was quite nice and was deserted but we didn't see any turtles. We didn't do much there apart from I had a nice snooze on a bench and we snacked on a healthy lunch of dried fruit, chocolate filled wafer biscuits and deep-fried masala beans.

The walk  back was equally sweaty but didn't seem as far. We were enticed into to a nearby called 'Mom's and Pop's' by a Malaysian/Indian taxi driver and enjoyed some tasty local curries as we chatted to him.
The bus back was still freezing but not too bad now that we weren't soaked with rain. We got off at a local shopping centre called Komtar to do some wire shopping so we could replace the bag of wiress we left on Koh Tao. Miraculously, we stumbled across compouter section in the middle of otherwise deserted market, and found almost everything we needed. I did break accidentally break the clips (on both sides!) of my precious bumbag and so felt rather sulky as we looked at a few andriod phones . Taking a basic phone with me was a bit of a mistake because we mostly get wifi at restaurants when we don't actually have the laptop with us.

We took the free bus back near ur guesthouse and I got into a conversation with a nice Malaysian old man. We had been chatting for a while when he told me he'd been really sick and had been to the doctors and I hope he didn't notice when I started leaning back and covering my mouth. I then became more aware that he had a line of what looked like vomit around his mouth and a slick of browny/orange in his mouth and round his teeth. After this I struggled to concentrate and was quite relieved when he got off.

It was getting late by the time we returned and so spent a practical hour or so packing and going to the ATM, ready for our early start tomorrow.

23rd July - Penang

Struggled to wake up again due to airless, windowless room and so were late getting started.
After breakfast of our first Nasi Lemak (coconut rice with anchovy sambal) we went to the bus stop where we thought we could get the bus to the National Park. After waiting a long while for a bus that was apparently due every 5 mins there was still no sign so we hopped on the free shuttle bus that we couldn't find yesterday. We did a circuit of Georgetown and ended up back where we were before finally hitting jetty main station.

By this time it was past lunch so we amended plans and went to Penang Hill funicular instead. It's apparently the largest one in Malaysia and it was quite fun to ride even though I didn't enjoy it as much as the one in Hong Kong. I annoyed a lady who had pushed past us in the queue by refusing to move for the other two people she was waiting for so I guess I must be getting more self-assured in my old age. The view over the city was expansive but, like Hong Kong, the visibility was rubbish due to the weather.

We had a giggle about the 'Owl Museum' at the top because when I asked of there were any real owls there, the guy looked at me like I was insane!  I'm not sure of the appeal of a whole museum of stuff shaped like owls but someone must like it. We walked around top to 'Monkey Cup' carniverous plant garden and waved at the lazy gits who took the golf-buggy ride along the same route. I accidentally waved at the ;ady who took the huff with me and so ended up looking like a smug git but she waved back, despite looking very confused.
We bought some very tasty chickpeas (a surprise to Matt) and took a look around the Hindu temple and the outside of the mosque, both of which had been build for the people building the original railway.

The journey back down the funicular was a bit more scary because they packed it so full that I was afraid that it would go flying and crush us all into flesh soup at the bottom but we arrived safely and caught the bus to nearby Kek Lok Si buddhist  temple. We stopped to try the local speciality, Penang Laksa, which is a fishy stew that sounded lovely in theory (and was rated 7th most tasty world food by the New York Times) but was a bit too strong tasting for me.

Walked up to temple through an indoor market. The first thing we saw was the seven storey octagonal based 'Pagoda of 10,000 Buddhas' towering up in front of us and beyond, the rambling, multi-level complex of prayer halls, pagodas, bell towers and just about every other typical temple structure you can think of, in varying styles from Burmese to Chinese to Thai.

We took the inclined lift (more fun than the funicular) to very top to see the 30.2m bronze statue of Kuan Tin. As well as that and the other impressive statues, there were also smallish plaster-type figures spread around the garden including ones of Mickey and Minnie Mouse!

After walking down the big hill and catching the bus back to Georgetown, we went in search of more food from 'the leaflet' and tried Won Ton Mee and chicken satay sticks at the street stalls near our guesthouse.
We had a quick explore of the classier end of town with its expensive bars and hotels and took ourselves to bed.

22nd July - Penang

Despite learning in China that there is very little that I like about Chinese food, we somehow ended up having breakfast at Chinese place. Turns out that even toast and porridge are gross!

We went to Penang State Museum and learned about the multi-cultural origins of island. There was lots to look at and read but the really fun bit was finding the dressing up section. My second 'discovery' of the day was that Matt suits a fez, wrap and blazer combo - who'da thunk it? It was especially fun because we were soon joined by a young guy from the museum who took great pleasure in dressing us.

We headed back through little India for lunch and enjoyed a South Indian thali whilst thinking of Nic and our jaunt to Kerala.

There was a shuttle bus that circled the city but we waited for it for quite a while and it didn't show. Determined not to be thwarted, we set off on foot, looking for some of the places of interest on the tourist map. We saw lots of Chinese temples and mosques as well as a few interesting colonial-style buildings. We also discovered a street art installation type thing with a bike stuck to a wall with kids painted on the the wall itself and a phone box with 'fitting room' graffitied on the front and a guy changing spray-painted inside.

Shortly after stumbled across a flea market and Matt enjoyed wandering around looking for new cables to replace the ones that he left at Silver Sands in Koh Tao. Compared to car-boots back home, the people had very little on their stalls but it was still interesting to nosy at what people were getting rid of.

We headed back to the sea front to look at some of the buildings there and stopped for a cold drink. I tried chrysanthemum tea (not a fan) and Matt had 'lychee juice' - which was actually just the syrup out of a tin of lychees!

We visited Fort Cornwallis but didn't feel like reading the nonsensical boards so just enjoyed exploring the gunpowder store (shaped like a teletubby house), the cannons, the spooky, empty chapel and the prison. The fort was built for admin purposes not defense which was lucky 'cos it was tiny, though apparently it's the largest standing fort in Malaysia.

We sat outside the fort for a while, watching a tall Western lad play basketball with bunch of Indian kids and decided to spend our evening searching out some of the dishes outlined in a leaflet we discovered about how great Penang food is.

We found and tried Roti Canai, a soft, fluffy roti served on a banana leaf with a dash of curry; Mee Goreng, fried noodles in a thick, spicy tomato gravy with tofu and  stewed squid (apparently but we couldn't find any); Ais Kacang, shaved ice with sweetened syrups, jelly, condensed milk and sweetcorn (all of Asia seems to think it's a fruit and they put it in sundaes at McDonald's - they also do a sweetcorn rather than apple pie!). It also contained pearl barley instead of the traditional 'sweetened red beans' but I'm not sure if that's an improvement or not!

21st July - Some boat somewhere to Penang

The boat docked in the early hours and we peeled ourselves off our neighbour and disembarked. We were collected by a surly tuk tuk driver who took us to a tour office where I slept leant on a table until we were collected by the bus to Had Yai.

We were meant to be there at 10.30 but the bus took rest stop at 10am and didn't arrive til 12.30 - giving us just enough time to remove our bags and jump onto the next minibus.

The Malaysian border crossing simplest yet. We didn't even have an entry card to fill in and were just asked for fingerprints instead. We did have to lug our bags through for x-rays though they didn't even look at the screen.

Back on bus we continued towards Butterworth, stopping only for our first taste of scrummy Malaysian food and to change money. We planned to go to Butterworth to get the ferry to Penang but when the driver stopped on a main road, rather than the town itself, we were a little bit thrown. It turned outt hat the bus was going t Penang anyway and was happy to take us so we got back on a luckily avoided a long walk and further transport options.

The first room we looked at was so small door couldn't open. When we said we didn't want it we were taken across the road to Banana Guesthouse where room a bit better but the staff were rude. We were keen to just get rid of our bags and look around so we took it anyway.

When the British comandeered Penang, they encouraged settlers from all over to come and live there. Consequently, it became inhabited by migrants from India, China and Europe, as well as ethinic Malays. Each group brought their foods, traditions and practices and these have been preserved there until today. There are areas dedicated as 'Chinatown' and 'Little India' but actually the cultures live and interact very harmoniously.

After frequent yearnings for Indian food in the last few months have left us disappointed and unsatisfied, we headed straight for Little India. The music, smells and shops there soon convinced us of its authenticity and the somasa stall we visited was all the persuading we needed to dive headfirst into a nearby restaurant.
We walked down to the sea front, around the bustling food courts and stumbled upon a massive Japanese festival going on outside the city hall. We stopped in the throng of people to look at the dance being performed on the big stage and got talking to a young man there. He was clearly Aspergers and talked to us for a long time, giving us facts and figures about the festival, Thailand and the UK.

There was lots going on and a really lively atmosphere so we spent quite a while just walking around, looking at the groups of people sitting on the grass or looking at the many stalls that were there.

After watching more dancing, we were about to head back when we realised that our watches were an hour out because of the time difference and so decided to stay for the grande finale fireworks display. The fireworks were let off from Fort Cornwallis nearby and, although they were nice to watch, what was more fun was listening to the exaggerated chorus of 'oohs' and 'aahs' from the crowd.

20th July- Koh Tao

We checked out of the White Sands in the morning feeling a bit tired. I'd woken in the early hours to find that the ants from the bathroom had migrated to my bed and had not settled after that.

We considered doing the advanced diving course but our ears were too sore and we wondered if we might benefit from learning elsewhere later in the future. Unfortunately, sore ears and the fact we had no room to change in meant that I also had to give up on my trapeze dream for the time being.

We left our bags at reception and spent the day on the beach, trying to stay out of the sun. We found a nice beach restaurant but it was still actually a little dull at times because we didn't feel too sparkly, had seen enough of the 'town' and couldn't go in the sea because we wouldn't have been able to shower.

At 8pm we were taken to 'sleeper boat' where we were due to spend the night. After quite a wait, we were eventually herded on. We had seen pictures of the boat at the travel agent but were still not quite prepared for the size of the beds. Each tiny 'mattress' was places as close as possible to the next tiny 'mattress' so it was like sleeping with lots of strangers in one giant bed. In total, the boat held 120 passengers so it was very 'cosy' indeed.

Somehow, we actually slept quite well but Matt did keep waking up face-to-face with the guy next to him and getting a bit of a shock.

19th - Koh Tao

We had a 6.30am start for diving and so wanted a good breakfast before. None of the many local restaurants seem to have taken advantage of this daily event and so we ended up eating cereal from 7-11 out of bowls fashioned from the bottom half of plastic water bottles.

The organisation was a little more efficient than usual and it wasn't long before we were being taxied to the pier further round the island, where we had to make our way precariously across 6 or 7 other boats to get to ours.

Our first dive was at Shark Island and though the sea wasn't churning quite so much, it was still a rough ride to get there. Despite managing to jump forwards into the water yesterday, I couldn't pluck up courage to perform the 'giant stride' and so climbed down the ladder into the sea like a numpty.

My ears were a lot better than yesterday and I really enjoyed the dive. Though it was a shame about last night's storm because it meant that the visibility was pretty bad. We did get to see a few pretty things though and it was cool going all the way down to 18m. And it turns out I'm kinda good at blowing water rings. They're like smoke rings but prettier and not as hazardous to your health.

For our second dive of the day we went to White Rock. The sea was still rough and the boat took the long way round the island to avoid the worst of it though we were all still feeling a bit quesy when we got there.
This time we had to sit on the edge and roll backwards off the boat. A combination of the shame I'd felt climbing the ladder and the fact that I find it easier not knowing what I'm falling into, meant that I found this a whole lot easier. I was quite excited about the descent after the ease of this morning but my stupid ears betrayed me. My ears hurt so badly after the first few metres that I found myself resurfacing completely. The choppiness of the sea really didn't help and I was soon being thrown about by the waves. A bit of help from Henry and I managed to descend eventually but I felt quite sorry for Gina and Florence because it didn't seem very long before Matt had used up all of his air and we had to start our ascent.

After a bit of a rest and some food, we met up to watch the DVD. Axell had done a great job and had edited out most of our silly mistakes. Unfortuately, this didn't include my climbing down the ladder and so I have been eternally captured as a wally and a wimp.   Despite this, and the fact it was super-expensive, we conceded to buying a copy.

A couple of drinks later, we joined Claire and Henry at the island's trapeze school where we had a few more drinks and watched a showcase of new and experienced trapeze artists. I really fancied having a go and resolved to join one of the classes the following day.

18th - Koh Tao

Our PADI start course didn't start until 11am so we went for breakfast and I tried to get my head around dive tables. It must have worked because I completed the exam and got top marks! Matt and I did did get competetive for the role of class swot but I won fair and square(ish). Some of the questions really are quite silly though!

We had the usual rigmarole before getting out in the boat and moving from the small boat to the big one was challenging enough because of how rough the sea was.

We were meant to go to 'Twins' and 'Japanese Gardens' but instead did Shark Island (so named because it apparently looks like a shark, not because sharks are usually found there)  and White Rock because it was simply too choppy to do the original sites.

My ears were awful! We descended using a boat rope for a guide and my ears were soon agony. When I tried to ascend a little bit to try and equalise it, it just seems to be getting worse and I couldn't stop myself from whimpering. Claire was really helpful and calm but kept trying to lead me away from the rope. I resisted because if I was in that much pain having something to hold on to that I couldn't imagine how bad it would get if I started to freefall. When my head hit a tangle of ropes, I started to realise that things were not quite as they should be but couldn't understand Claire's gestures.

After swimming around on a level for a bit, things improved and I really started to enjoy myself. I loved looking around all of the colourful corals and fish and it was really so beautiful and quite clear.

After our ascent, Claire explained that she was really annoyed because the boat we were using had known we were there but had chucked its rope anyway. I felt lots better knowing that this was why I kept sinking and didn't recognise all of the ropes above me.

Matt, on the other hand, was a bit bloody nosed and frustrated because his nose seems to bleed from the pressure and prevent him from being able to clear his mask properly. Every time I looked at him he always had half a mask full of water like something out of a cartoon. I was obviously concerned because of his contact lenses but couldn't help but giggle a little at the sight of it.

On our second dive my ears were much better and it was much more relaxing exploring the underwater world when I hadn't had the trauma of the pain first. We did a few skills and I learned how to to blow bubble rings. I was instantly quite good at it so that may be the talent that I have waited 31 years to discover! Know I just have to work out how to market it!

It took us a long while to get our land legs back once we were back on the island and we spent most of the evening rocking and reeling. Matt was also suffereing quite badly with his ears and I kept turning round to find him smacking his own tilted head to try and dislodge the water that he was convinced was still in there. Given that I'd seen how much seemed to collect in his nose and stay there until a really inopportune time, I would not have been at all surprised!

17th July - Koh Tao

After waking from a deep sleep in the poshest bed we'd seen for a while, I was quite looking forward to the day.

It took a good while to get Matt's new contacts in but eventually settled on a technique that we could start to refine: Matt sat on the loo using both hands to wrench his eye open and I dartied closer with the contact to try and slip it on his eyeball before his eyelids involuntarily closed. How one little eyelid can overpower the strength of two fully-grown arms and hands I really do not know but it took a while before we were 'successful' and Matt could emerge red-eyed, blinking and a little visually disorientated into the Koh Tao sunshine.

The course started at 9am and we completed the 4th and 5th sections of the course. We were saved from watching more cheesy PADI DVDs and Claire just told us what we needed to know to do the reviews. I seemed to have a severe case on the shakes and could barely write properly (probably the huge super-strong coffee we'd had with breakfast) so it was a relief not to sit through more American drivel while I jibbled away.

We took our exam early and it was quite simple but for some reason I suddenly could not get my head around the dive tables. They were phrased quite like Maths exams and were obviously fairly straight forward but I got hot, frustrated and even more quivery so I (reluctantly) took a break and went for lunch instead.
In the afternoon we were due to start our 'Confined Sessions' where we start to learn the skills needed before diving. It was meant to be in the pool but it was being drained and so we took the boat to Mango Bay to do them there.

The first job was to prove that we could swim a certain distance, but the bigger task for me was actually being able to jump in the water. I just don't do jumping off things. At Halong Bay, I looked longingly at the people jumping from the boat to the sea and without comprehension at the people who jumped backwards from the top deck. In all honesty, the sea scares me. It's vast, deep, powerful, contains all sorts on crazy things, tastes awful, and I only learnt to swim about a year ago! I'm not a big fan of being in the swimming pool when my feet can't touch the floor and have only  parallel to the shore the sea and certainly no more than about chest deep!

After a few false starts, nearly giving up and going back, and generally feeling like an absolute dufus, I finally braved it - holding Claire's hand I might add. I'd tried to jump in holding Matt's hand previously but had chickened out and let him go. Thankfully he's had the sense to let go to and hadn't dragged me in head first.
After a couple of circuits of the boat, we climbed back onboard and started to get our gear on - and that's when the fun with the equipment started. Matt's weight belt wasn't long enough to go around his waist and my wetsuit turned out not to have a functioning zip. Luckily, there were spares and it didn't take too long before we were on our way.

The next challenge was trying to do a 'giant stride' from the boat, weating all of our gear. I know that i couldn't drown because I was wearing my inflated BCD but it still took me a fair few count-ins to finally do it. And when I did, my feet changed their minds and started scrambling for the edge.

Once in the sea I was fine and appreciated the views of the lighthouse site and the fact that with the BCD and a decent snorkel, I managed my first successful snorkelling session ever. There were so many pretty fishies swimming around beneath me that I couldn't help but be excited.

Learning the skills was good fun and it felt weird but wonderful to kneel a few meters under the sea and still be able to breathe. Staying upright was a bit more of a challenge because of the pull of the waves above us but I can't say that I didn't enjoy being dragged around a bit and bumping into people - at least for the first 10 minutes anyway.

We had to head back eventually because the group who'd gone diving were back and the boat and Matt had run out of air but I was very much looking forward to our first proper dive. Siobhan really didn't like being under the water though and so decided not to pursue the course. I felt sorry for her but I also couldn't help but feel relieved that I wasn't the only one with issues.

There was a vague plan to join the event of the fortnight and go and watch Leeroy Thornhill (ex-Prodigy fella) DJ at a bar later in the evening but after dinner we were quite tired. We did wander past and even though it hadn't started it was already super loud so we were very middle-aged and gave it a miss.

Instead we ended up at a bar further down the street, listening to odd lounge versions of popular somgs and watching rubbish but gracious fireshow guys practising their performance. I think it was the proper show but they had a fair few mishaps that made us pleased that we hadn't opted for the front-row seats. We were suitable placed to watch the horror of a group of guys sat in front as burning stick came flying towards them several times. It seemed to elicit a better response from the audience when they missed than when they didn't so there was a really nice, encouraging atmosphere as well as no real catastrophes.

16th July - Bangkok to Koh Tao

Around 7am we were herded onto the ferry. I somehow fell asleep again - this time across very uncomfortable moulded seats.

We docked about 10am and thankfully, a lift from Davy Jones Locker (DJL) diving school was waiting there and so we avoided the usual confusing clamour to get to a guesthouse.

The lady at DJL was nice and gave us the option of starting our course today or tomorrow. We decided that since the 1st day was all theory and DVD watching, that we'd just be happpy to crack on with it. Less fortunately, the previous guests hadn't checked out of our room so all we could really do was wander til 12.30. It was a nice island though and was mostly populated with dive schools so we were really glad we'd made the decision of who to go with before we got there because otherwise we would have been confounded by the range of choice. Instead we stopped for a good brunch at the Coffee Boat and took a quick walk to see what was further down the road until it was tie to go to the room.

We started course at 2 and were introduced to Claire, our instructor, and Florence and Siobhan, our classmates. After a bit of waiting, some form filling, a DVD malfunction and a room change, we watched the corny instruction DVDs and answered the review questions. The information itself wasn't difficult, the hardest thing was being a 'student' again: working in a stuffy room, feeling sleepy and feeling question anxiety.
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Because I'd stupidly told the truth about taking regular medication on my health assessment form, I had to go and get a doctor's clearance from a nearby health clinic. Matt immediately got tolf off for not taking his shoes off before he went in but they had 3 dogs in there! The nurses were really rude and roughly took my blood pressure before sending me in to the doctor. I 'consulted' the doctor at the same time and in the same room as another man who was undergoing a procedure. The doctors asked me what medication I was taking, touched his stomach to confirm and listened to my chest before signing my form and sending me on his way. The whole thing took about 3 minutes!

Since it had dawned on Matt that he couldn't wear his glasses under his mask, we started looking into contact lenses. The lady in the shop was really helpful and took Matt's precription form his glasses so that he didn't have to go back to the room. After a bit of faffing and a conversation with one of DJL's instructors, Matt was the nervous owner of 15 days worth of disposable contacts.

We were home by 7pm to do our homework, which was qiute a lot ore time-consuming than we expected. By 11pm we were in bed and looking forward to spending some actual time in the sea whilst on this island.

14th July - Kanchanaburi

We rose at 5am for the 6am train but when we arrived at station, we were told that the train was delayed until 7am. We looked at the interestingly shaped topiary of nagar and dinosaurs and popped to 7-11 for coffee and weird croissant toasties. On the way back to the station, Matt discovered his favourite banana/sticky rice treats being freshly cooked in their banana leaves. I've got a feeling we might end up with an early start tomorrow since morning stalls are usually all packed up by 8 or 9am. After further delays and a nap on the platform of the quaint station, we set off around 8.15.

At the 'Bridge over the Kwai' stop, the train was boarded by a stream of already drunken Thais (I assume they were Thai but they did drink like Laos guys), who sang songs and chants and chatted happily for the rest of the journey.

The views of rural Thailand and the misty mountains were really quite lovely but we had to be careful not to let our fingers, elbows or faces hang out of the open window since the train fitted very snugly into the alloted space, meaning that even the slightest bit of overhang would be whipped by bushes, bashed concrete posts or risk being entagled in electric cables.

 Not that the train was moving particularly fast. It had a top speed of about 45mph when all you could hear was the sound of the engine and clunking of the carriages as they swung from side to side, straining at their links. Occasionally, the Thai guys stood at the end of the carriage would all give a large cry and for one moment we'd wonder if the train had come off the track.

Passing over the viaducts, it was impossible not to marvel at what the POW's who built it had achieved. It was also a bit hair-raising when everyone rushed to one side to look out of the windows into the valleys below.

We arrived Nam Tok about 10.30 and debated paying the 600 baht taxi fare to Hellfire Pass but when the guy insisted we'd only be able to stay for an hour, we decided to jump in the shared songthaew to a nearby waterfall. It was driven by the same guy who wanted to take us Hellfire Pass and I couldn't help but wonder if he would have thrown the full truck-load of people out if we'd agreed. As we arrived and peeled ourselves out of the back seat (which was still better than the metal cage of the truck), the driver told us, "This waterfall. No water."

There wasn't actually very much water, but there was still enough for a small pool where little kids swam and played in inner tubes. There was a helpful information stand though and he confirmed that we could get a bus and wrote down the destination in Thai for us.

We completed the small circuit of the waterfall and headed across the road for the bus. We flagged down the next one that wasn't a party bus blasting out music and full of druken Thais. It wasn't the actual public bus but after a brief discussion with a  local woman (probably to ascertain the price we'd normally get charged), the conducter agreed to take us for 30baht each.

We jumped on and about 20 mins later were deposit squarely outside a security fence. We followed the road, past the emus to the Hellfire Pass Museum. The museum is curated by an Australian guy and was excellent. There weren't many objects there to look at since POWs had very little and most of what they did have was burnt to try and stop the spread of cholera, but the information was interesting and there were some statues, a film and a few heartwrenching paintings by POW's.

After being given an audio tour handset and a walkie-talkie(!), we made our way down the ballast path and through Hellfire pass. The audio tour was outstanding and included insights from the POW's who had toiled to create the path through the rock. The ground underfoot was made from the blasted rock and was tough going for Dave and his flip-flops. It was impossible to imagine what walking on it barefoot while carrying a load would have been like, never mind having to do in the extreme climate when beaten, sick and starving.

Taking in the view from the top of the pass, we got a better idea of the magnitude of the task and tried to imagine what 416km of similar work in 20 months would entail. Roughly 13,000 POWs and 100,000 Asian workers died during this time. Of the POW survivors, many were tragically killed as the allies bombed Japanese ships as they transported the prisoners back. Perhaps more sad is the fact that there are no records of the Asian workers who were lured by promises of good pay and conditions, only to suffer equal cruelties.
We would have liked to continue to the end of the route bus needed to get back in time for the 3.30 train and so took the path that the prisoners used to walk and headed back to the museum.

We were out on the main road just in time to catch the local bus as it careered past. It got to our stop just as the heavens opened. Luckily, we found out that it was actually going all the way back to Kanchanburi and so not only did we get to stay dry, we avoided the clunky train, arrived back nearly 2 hours early and got dropped off near our favourite chicken stand just in time for freshly cooked food.

Out in evening. 10B bar and bus organising. Sang in pub. Home reasonably early

13th July - Kanchanaburi

After last night's antics and falling asleep on a very lumpy pillow, I woke up with a bit of a headache and so slept for a while longer while Matt took a walk to the bridge over the river Kwai and visited a rubbishy museum whihc he said was, 'full of random rubbishy exhibits with no information and photocopied photographs with badly translated hand-written descriptions'.

After lunch, we visited the Thailand-Burma Railway Research Centre down the road. It's curated by an English guy who's spent the last 18 years reasearching and is excellent. We spent a good few hours reading the information and looking at the scales and models. Particularly touching were the few belongings that had been donated by POWs or their families.

Afterwards we took a slow walk around the cemetery which is just outside. It was beautifully maintained with flowers between every stone.  It was very emotional to read the few short inscriptions and see the young ages of the soldiers. Most of the soldiers commemmorated at this particular site were British and Dutch and only in their early 20's. The few that were over thirty seemed ancient in comparison. We could have spent longer there but it was already 5pm and so we were politely waved away so they could lock up.
After the gravity of the afternoon, it seems insensitive to mention that we then discovered the best chicken ever, but, having come half way around the world, it's important to note such things when they occur. We also bought a giant grapefruit-shaped thing called a pomelo which was a pain to get into but actually quite nice. The pith was that thick that each segment was like a little individual package of fruit.

We hooked up with Dave in the evening but were very tired after last night and so could barely finish our fruit shake before clearing off to bed for an early night in preparation for an early start

12th July - Bangkok to Kanchanaburi

The area around Khao San road is a nightmare for someone with my navigational issues. Each street is not only lined with shops, but the shops are lined with markets. Trapped between shop-fronts and market stalls, most of my concentration is going into not tripping over or barging into anyone or anything with just a tiny bit spare for the pretty things that might catch my eye. Thankfully Matt is much more talented than me and so somehow, the last minute dash to buy the few bits and bobs that caught my eye during our short time in Bangkok was actually very successful. I managed to collect the trousers that I'd had adjusted and get a few other things that fit while we were still in a city that caters for the anyone bigger than 4'10"  or 8st.

We'd been told that best way to Thon Buri train station was by taxi and so splashed out (or got ripped off) on an actual car for once. It turned out to be quite a short trip and so arrived in plenty of time to drop our bags at the 1920's style station and go for a wander around a big outdoor market complex which was empty apart from a few giant rats and the occasional sleeping worker.

We stopped for lunch at a popular street restaurant and got a whole fish, some chicken, rice and papaya salad for about 2 quid. I loved Laos but it is nice to be back somewhere where there is a little bit more variety in the food. Although Thais do have a bit of a thing for processed meat on sticks or in balls so my favourite noodle soup is pretty much off the menu now.

Back at the station, we bought a coconut,  pineapple and a weird but delicious bright green fruit with a white foamy middle and chatted to an Australian guy called Dave.

The train was really basic and very loud but there were clean loos and it was nice to be able to get up and wander (or stumble) around for a change.

We arrived at Kanchanaburi just as a big rain hit so we took the first songtheow and ended up at Sugarcane guesthouse. The rain showed no sign of slowing and so we spent several hours in the restaurant over the river just chatting to Dave. Fortunately, I was in the bungalow when a giant lizard fell off the roof and splattered on to the table next to Matt. It was a bit stunned and so just sat there for a while before scurrying off.

Eventually we took a short walk to the main street and it somehow turned into a long night. Which is I guess what happens when you stumble across a 10 baht bar in a street which is pretty much nothing but bars.

Across the way was a bar which had an attached tattoo studio where a girl was having the whole of her forearm tattooed. We (or rather, Dave) got chatting to some Swiss girls and we all moved across the road. After the band (who were occasionally dreadful) finished playing and competing with the musicians next door, I spent the evening chatting to Soropan, who was clearly a local figure, and a funny English guy called Harry George Martin Hobson (the third) before finally crawling into bed somewhere around 5am.